PoT: Standalone: Challenge - Chapter Four

[branchandroot]

Fic post from my archive.

Challenge: Chapter Four

Niou and Yagyuu settle into their partnership. Drama, I-3

"You do realize," Masaharu murmured, "that you can be polite while still smashing them into jelly."

Comments

[beckymarie.livejournal.com]

Two of the lines that stood out most for me were "You know, you could just say you don't want me to play with my food," he pointed out. and Though, he glanced at Yagyuu, standing at the fence beside him, he supposed there could be reasons for defending someone stronger. both because they are such wonderful examples of the Niou you're building here, along with the way you're building that sense of team--I love that they didn't start out as one, but slowly, over the course of the story, you can feel them coming together. The way Yukimura is so charismatic, with such a deft touch, yet posessing strength and iron that probably none of the other players can quite match. It feels right that they all both like and adore him as their leader.

Yagyuu and Niou's relationship is feeling so very natural at this point, which I love, because they're not... *waves hands* boring or attached at the hip or clingy so much as that perfect balance between synchronization and still being very much their individual selves. And I LOVE the seeds you're sowing for the switch, the way Yagyuu sometimes wants to let go, the way Niou fan feel it burning in him.

Kirihara's addition was also wonderfully done, not instant love, but there's a certain something there that makes me believe that Yukimura (and Niou) would take an interest in him, further developing the TEAM sense we have in the current time.

This really is one of the absolutely best done Rikkai fics I've had the pleasure to read. *purrs happily while waiting for more* >:D

[branchandroot]

*grins* I think it will be two more parts before Niou has his moment of inspiration for the switch; by then it should be fate.

More coming soon! *dances off in a cloud of happy feedback*