branchandroot | PoT: Challenge: The Continuation of War

Entry tags:

PoT: Challenge: The Continuation of War

Fic post from my archive.

A small snafu leads to some practice time between Rikkai and Seigaku, just before the end of Nationals. Drama, I-3

Momo cast his erstwhile opponent a thoughtful glance. "You know, Marui-san," he said, slowly, "all of you are acting really different, today."

Marui cocked an eyebrow at him. "Of course we are," he responded, easily, "Yukimura's back."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<fangirling [...] that's>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

{Grinning like a cat}

The *only* thing right now preventing me from jumping up and down and screaming and running around the place is that I'm at school, and I don't think my colleagues would appreciate me interrupting their concentration right now...

But *damn*! I can't stop grinning--and it's beginning to hurt my cheeks! {laughs}

Okay, Insert fangirling here <FANGIRLING that's at least ten pages long filled with inarticulate run on sentences and what not> There... now I can get to the comments.

The parrells you've drawn between these two seemingly (at first look, anyway) unlike teams is just... superbs. They're original team dynamics blend together in a taste that is just... well, better than German Chocolate Cake... better than vanilla custard ice cream.... better than se---well, no. But it comes damn close to being better than sex. ^.^;;

Right from the opening, starting with our favorite Rikkaidai and their missing kouhai... volleying to peeks of Seigaku and their missing freshmen... straight into the matches... and follow up.

And you did a very good job of keeping this story from Rikkaidai's telling point. I think that would have been the hardest part for many a good writers--despite the fact that this series has been told from Rikkaidai's PoV, once you reintroduce the original series's cast it's just so easy to slip back into their point of view. I'm very glad you didn't. ^.^;;

Ah, but the play on the relationships... the subtle "attacks" and then... {internal squeals and then forces herself to breath again} Yeah... what can I say---this series has me completely hooked and excited. I'm always thrilled to find out there's more available to read... and it's soo hard to point out the spots that I love the most...

Like, Echizen's "Emperor" comment, and Kirihara's surprise at jumping at Tezuka's beck and call. Sanada, Yanagi and Fuji heading Tezuka and Yukimura off before they could get into a friendly match... Momo and Bunta and their little conversation... and---

Ah ha! I found it! Something I *didn't* like about this story! It's lack of Jungle Loving!!! Where's Jackal??? He doesn't even have, like, a single line! What's with that??? {sniffles} My poor, abused, Brazillian!

{laughs} Okay... I better get back to typing up my own Rikkaidai Doubles fic, ne? ^.^;;

Where's Jackal???

*wails pitifully* I couldn't fit him in this one!

I am, indeed, waffling severely over how to show what's happening with the Seigaku boys. I don't want to give up the Rikkai pov, but if I want to explore Fuji's development any further I'm going to have to go outside what they're likely to witness. A sidestory, maybe.

Yes! You should get on with your own Rikkai Doubles fic! *grins*

*looks* there's *always* room for jackal!

A side story is an idea... or, is Fuji going to be involved with a variety of Rikkaidai or just certain select individuals? You could try a story from bi-polar PoV? A scene from Rikkai's view, a scene from Fuji's... ??

And I *am* writing this darn fic... It's just proving to be a little tricky 'cause, uh, there are like, five or nine other stories on my desktop clamoring for attention, too >.< I swear... they're multiplying when I'm not looking...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

PoT: Challenge: The Continuation of War

no subject

no subject

no subject